I think this is one of those times where I received an emailed confession through an anon email service, and got it late. The original confessor must've rewritten it and send it again.
John
even though it happened years ago, i still think about it from time to time with very mixed emotions. I never filled you in on everything that happened between her and I, and I probably never will. We fucked. Hard. Not just that day that we got caught together but several times before then and later after that time. A complicated entanglement that started months before our marriage lasted well into the first year of it. I never told you the whole truth because I didn't want to hurt you any more than I had to.
But I miss her.
I love you and always will.
But I miss her.
I think about her often and would jump at the chance to reconnect with her even if only for a clandestine hour or so of unbridled passion. I would never share this fact with you because you wouldn't understand how I could want her and you both. So as much as it eats me up, I keep quiet about it. Sometimes when I'm silent you ask me what I'm thinking.
I usually lie because I'm thinking her.
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A place for husbands, boyfriends and everyone else to let out their little secret, or just proclaim their love for someone.
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2 comments:
Don't you think your wife/gf deserves more from you? Unless you wanna break up with her, why keep thinking of the other woman? It's so unfair.
This is really horrible.
Are you being fair to her?
And equally importantly, are you being fair to yourself?
I don't know you, so I will do my best not to judge you, but I do hope that you read this...and I don't know what your faith is or even if you have one. But I really think you could benefit with some time with God, both one on one and with your life. Talk to a pastor, a father, someone. That wretched sick feeling in your stomach doesn't always have to be there. You don't have to feel filthy. All can be forgiven, and its never too late to fall even more deeply, madly, truly in love with your wife. So much so that you will never have to see that woman in your mind ever again.
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